The Importance of Self-Care!

Self-Care For Parents
By Mia Redrick

The demands of family life are exhausting. Carpooling, school activities, and birthday parties are just some of the many things we support in our children's lives. As parents, it is easy to become so inundated taking care of our children that we forget to nurture ourselves. This month, let's make a commitment to nurture Mom and Dad. Our children are counting on us to set the right examples for them to follow. Let's teach them the value of self-care. By doing so, we illustrate to our children the importance of loving ourselves.

When we take time to care for ourselves, we feel empowered and are better able to accomplish more in our lives. Caring for ourselves permits us to love everyone around us better. As a result, we become more giving, grateful, and happy. By establishing quality adult time, we can connect and reflect on who we really are and what we really want. When was the last time you considered what was best for you? When was the last time you relaxed in your favorite chair and enjoyed a cup of coffee? How many minutes each day do you get to connect with your spouse? Making the commitment to improve the quality of each day is a decision. Take small steps to enhance your life.

Over the course of this year I am going to share with you some specific strategies on caring for Mom and Dad. As the mother of three children between one and eight years old, I know first-hand the challenges that parents face. My husband and I make time every month to consistently nurture ourselves and our relationship. I believe that the best parents are ones that place their self-care as a priority. The benefits to our children are immediate when we take better care of ourselves. By sowing self-care into our lives we reap the benefits of reduced personal stress, anxiety and frustration. This month, follow my five strategies for Renewing the Self:

Rest
Find time to be still every day. Take the time to stop the roller coaster of life and slow down. When we are rested, we make better decisions.

Read
Renew your mind. Fall in love with reading again. In my home, we Drop Everything And Read (D.E.A.R). Set clear expectations with your children that everyone is going to read individually for 15 minutes, thereby limiting interruptions. No excuses. Reading allows us to escape the pressures of the day and allows us to expand our minds.

Rejuvenate
Rejuvenate your spirit. Take some time each day to connect with your higher power. Pray, reflect and meditate to connect with your spirit and allow peace to work in your life.

Readjust
Readjust your priorities. Is your family too busy? This is a great question to ask. Is your family racing from Monday morning to Sunday evening? Limit your children's activities. Be realistic about each commitment.

Reward
Reward yourself. Go on a date with yourself, your spouse or a friend. Take some time away from the children and enjoy some grown-up time. When you return you will feel like a new person.

Making the decision to care for yourself is a choice. This month, choose to make self-care a priority. Remember that self-care is not negotiable, but necessary in order to be the best parent possible.

Live Fully,
Mia

Challenge! - Making the decision to care for yourself is a choice. This month, choose to make self-care a priority. Remember that self-care is not negotiable, but necessary in order to be the best parent possible. And to get you started creating your own list of goals, I would like to invite you to claim your free access to my E-book "Eliminating Mommy Burn-Out". Get free access at http://www.helpformomsreport.com

From Mia Redrick- Author, Time for mom-Me:5 Essential Strategies for A Mother's Self-Care and Finding Definitions, the premier self-care community for mothers http://www.findingdefinitions.com

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Don't Lose Sight of the Big Picture!

Many times, while my children were growing up, I found myself getting upset, angry, and frustrated with one thing or another. Instead of enjoying the relationship to the fullest, I often worried about grades, messy rooms, unusual hair styles, boyfriends, girlfriends, the future, the past, etc. Today, I can't even remember the reasons for many of our arguments and disagreement, and most of the things I worried about never happened.

In the midst of life's minor annoyances, it's easy to lose sight of what really matters. We can all too easily miss the forest for the trees. When you find your relationship with your children becoming strained over things that won't matter a few months from now, take a step back and ask yourself these questions?

• Is this worth putting a strain on our relationship?
• Will I even care about this in a few weeks?
• What am I really upset about?
• How can I handle this in a way that keeps the relationship in tact?
• How would I have liked my own parents to have dealt with this issue?
• What is the lesson I want to teach my son/daughter about handling conflicts?

Copyright © 2008 by Holly A. Cox, L.C.P.C., C.D.C.®

Life is Not Fair!

When my children were little, one of the worst things they could say to me at the time (or so I thought) was that I was not being fair. Oh, how I dreaded those words. However, it didn't really matter what I did or did not do. If it wasn't to their liking, I was guilty of the dreaded unfairness crime. I've changed my mind about the whole concept of fairness since then.

Sure, in an ideal world, it would be wonderful if everyone received "fair" treatment. However, in the real world, unfairness runs rampant. Good friends of mine lost three of their four daughters to Cystic Fibrosis. Another very dear friend was just diagnosed with Esophageal Cancer and now has to undergo aggressive chemotherapy treatment. The news is filled with evidence of bad things happening to good people. They lose their jobs, their spouses, their homes, their loved ones, and more, and none of it is fair.

Sweeping unfairness from the paths of our children all of the time does them an injustice. It deprives them of the opportunity to learn to handle small disappointments, and it can create a sense of entitlement. Of course, I am not recommending sitting back and doing nothing about serious issues. However, allowing them to handle the regular disappointments of childhood and adolescence builds their resilience. When life eventually hits them with greater setbacks, they will be prepared to face them head on!

Copyright © 2008 by Holly A. Cox, L.C.P.C., C.D.C.®

Regroup, Energize, Entertain, and Pamper Yourself!

As a parent, you need to take time out to regroup, energize, entertain, and pamper yourself. Take advantage of the slower summertime pace, and relax with a great book. Try these for starters.